lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
