One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
