I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just want nice things and good sex
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
