Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
