Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
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