How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
