Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Randomize
