I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
