i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
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Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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