There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
