chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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