your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
