I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i came on her dog
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
