so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
