Texts From Last Night

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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling

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  (651): But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling http://tfl.nu/6n5a
  Replies (1) Good night (768) Bad night (1109)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.

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  (504): Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown. http://tfl.nu/w5m1
  Replies (35) Good night (2215) Bad night (741)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.

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  (617): I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront. http://tfl.nu/9odf
  Replies (15) Good night (3820) Bad night (793)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...

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  (757): If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up... http://tfl.nu/b9ou
  Replies (55) Good night (6270) Bad night (1079)
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  (518): View more from New York

  you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was

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  (518): you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was http://tfl.nu/ydfc
  Replies (14) Good night (4842) Bad night (1071)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.

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  (412): I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight. http://tfl.nu/4uel
  Replies (7) Good night (2665) Bad night (850)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.

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  (912): Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane. http://tfl.nu/mwfa
  Replies (4) Good night (1951) Bad night (951)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...

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  (847): I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest... http://tfl.nu/j6s5
  Replies (6) Good night (2612) Bad night (832)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool

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  (778): He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool http://tfl.nu/x8lz
  Replies (5) Good night (1253) Bad night (537)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame

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  (303): Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame http://tfl.nu/4ytk
  Replies (2) Good night (763) Bad night (420)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes

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  (970): I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes http://tfl.nu/f5p7
  Replies (2) Good night (491) Bad night (727)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.

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  (519): We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it. http://tfl.nu/woad
  Replies (2) Good night (425) Bad night (583)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it

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  (813): I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it http://tfl.nu/wnc3
  Replies (0) Good night (544) Bad night (371)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.

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  (607): Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on. http://tfl.nu/m1je
  Replies (2) Good night (577) Bad night (298)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind

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  (802): It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind http://tfl.nu/l4my
  Replies (1) Good night (232) Bad night (377)

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