the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize