I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
