fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
When are your genitals available?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
