I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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