You're so nebulous sometimes
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize