So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
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