im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
