he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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