I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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