I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
