For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
