So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
