I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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