i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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