and next time when you feel me up, do it right
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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