There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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