I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
