So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
True college students do jello shots in the library
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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