If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
