Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize