dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
