I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize