the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
that may or may not have been my penis.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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