hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize