yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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