they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Randomize