im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
