I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
