But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
