My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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