Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
