and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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