Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
