out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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