i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
dude. I can hear the air.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
